We're One, But We're Not the Same

You may well have realised that we were away for Christmas - visiting my parents in Suffolk for the most part. While we were away, my wife and I took advantage of the already present baby-sitters to allow us both to go out to midnight Communion on Christmas Eve - a rare opportunity!

The problem was, where did we go? The church my parents attend, where we would usually go if we were back in Suffolk, didn't have a midnight service. So we decided to go to the church my Grandma attends, which as it happens is the church I grew up in. Being able to take my 84-year old Grandma with us and allow her to "show off" her family was of course an added bonus for her (and no doubt one which will have earned us all brownie points)!

So we arrived at the church, which at first glance appeared not to have changed much since I was last there some 13 years ago... and we proceeded to engage what was in many ways, a pretty foreign experience to me, despite my history at that church. For starters, it took a while to get used to singing from a hymn book instead of a screen - and that was made more complicated as the entire service proceeded to follow a liturgical pattern set down in the service book, complete with bold passages for all to say together and ordinary type for the minister to read.  

The hymns, played at regulation organ speed on an electronic organ, although one tuned to sound as much like a pipe organ as is possible, were, although not entirely unknown to me, generally somewhat obscure for a Christmas Eve communion service (although we did sing all six verse of O Come, All Ye Faithful!) and the sermon. Well, lets just say, it seemed to be a chance for the minister to expound a well-honed socio-political message, using carefully selected bible passages for support. Not that it was a message that I found particularly difficult, or would chose to disagree with particularly, but it felt a little bit "cherry-picked" for me, rather than an exposition of biblical truth.... 

All in all, it was a very traditional service, and one completely different even from what we'd have had at Queens Road, which, lets face it, is hardly "cutting edge" in worship terms! And yet, having said all that, above everything I found odd, or difficult, or downright foreign, it was Jesus, the incarnate son of God, the newly born Messiah, who shone through. 

It may have taken a few days to get round to it, but once the busy-ness of Christmas was over, that service started me thinking. Because, despite all I found "wrong" with it, it was clear that it was the same God being worshipped there, and that it was a place where people were able to meet with God. And at the end of the day, isn't that what worship is really about? Isn't the whole point of a service, in fact of everything that we do as "church", to facilitate and enable people to meet with God. So does this mean there is a place in church, in the broadest sense of the word, for liturgy, for hymns, for tradition? 

Emphatically, Yes! Because God has made each of us different, with different tastes, with different ways of thinking, with different ways of relating to each other and to him, then he must value diversity - and that means he must value different styles and understandings of worship. We may all be united in the body of Christ, but that doesn't make us into identical clones or robots. If people are truly meeting and doing business with him, then the type of music, the form of words, the presence or absence of liturgy is as irrelevant as the language used or the colour of the sanctuary walls! 

However, there is a word of caution here as well, because whilst these things are irrelevant to God, they are not necessarily irrelevant to people - if the style of worship is to facilitate in the meeting with God, then it must take account of the people who are meeting Him. And that means it needs to remain relevant and open to people coming into the church from the outside, not just to those who are already there. The hows, whys and wherefores of that are going to be different in every church, with each church needing to develop and understand its own particular way of being church, in the context of the people within, but more importantly, the context of the people to whom the church is called to reach out - because if the church is not reaching out and sharing the Good News with those outside its walls, then not only is it not fulfilling the Great Commission, but it is placing itself firmly on the path to extinction.

We Ate the Food, We Drank the Wine...

The big day has been and gone - the baby is in the manger, the angels have returned to the heavenly realms and the shepherds have returned to their fields. The Magi are of course still somewhere in transit, awaiting arrival on twelfth night, so we can conveniently forget about them for a few days.

Here in the White House, a wrapping paper bomb appears to have exploded, too much food has been consumed, and even more remains in the fridge. We even drank the wine, although I probably should be questioning my little brother who chose wine from the Casillero del Diablo - the Devil's Cellar! Presents have been given and received, and excited children have had a magical Christmas. And, after a busy December at work, at church and at home, I am now officially, completely and totally shattered... and in need of a holiday.


The problem is, I'm not very good at resting. I had a chance today - the children were at the theatre with my wife and Aunt, and, because I'm away at my parents', it wasn't possible to think about the ever-growing list of things that needs to be done at home. I had time and space to rest.


I tried, I really did try. I read my Bible, I read my book for a bit. And then I got a bit bored so wandered around to see what everyone else was doing... which was when I found my brother (he of the Devil's wine!) playing on his Playstation. Half an hour playing Call of Duty followed, which was good fun, but meant that, when the rest of the family returned, it still felt like I hadn't stopped... a good chance to relax had been taken, but I hadn't really rested.  


The need to rest is something that God recognises, and one of the reasons we are commanded to keep the Sabbath is to give us the opportunity to rest, as well as the chance to spend time in his presence, unencumbered by the worries of work - paid or otherwise. So perhaps if I get better at actually resting, I'll find it easier to spend time with him...

In the Name of Love

Christmas is now well and truly under-way.... Steak and Chips for 16 has been cooked and consumed, the Nativity story shared (this year from the Big Bible Storybook), and of course, stockings left out for Father Christmas (I will happily debate the morality of "lying" about Father Christmas to our children at a later date, but anyone who saw the joy and excitement in the faces of the four children here couldn't fail to understand the reasons!)

Finally, the culmination of the great plans are in sight, and this year, considering the numbers involved (23 people for Christmas lunch, aged between 84 and 0, spanning 4 generations for starts) they really are great plans - starting at least as far back as July... and it comes to completion tomorrow...

But of course we put all these plans in place to celebrate an even bigger plan - the biggest plan of all time - the plan to give humanity the biggest Gift possible, the Son of God himself, not as a powerful ruler come to take control by power, but as a tiny, vulnerable baby, born to live the life of a humble carpenter, to die a criminal's death, and yet in doing so to turn the world on its head. 

Its a plan which has its beginnings right back at the start, which is pointed to throughout the Old Testament, which reaches its culmination on the cross, and which continues to change lives today. Despite the humble start, its a plan which is breath-taking in its scope but most of all displays utter humility and total, unconditional love. 

So, as I finish this and look forward to midnight communion and the rest of our Christmas plans, I leave you with "O Holy Night", courtesy of Ben Cantalon and Stu G (ex-Delirious?), and with my hopes and prayers for a joyous and peaceful Christmas to you all. 

I'm Wide Awake, I'm Not Sleeping

I love both my children very much. Honestly, I do, but at 3.30 this morning, when 2 year old decided it was morning and he'd like to get up now, I struggled! The problem was, he'd been asleep, he'd woken up, so it must be morning. Time to get up and play - great!

But Daddy didn't agree. So some discussion took place - quickly and quietly, so as not to wake our 6 year old who was (and thankfully remained) fast asleep in the other bedroom. And so he snuggled back down, and spent the next hour or so trying to go back to sleep, with myself or my wife lying next to him on the cold hard floor... making sure he did actually settle.

So, while I was laid on the cold floor, I started to think (scary thing to do at 4am)... From his perspective, it seemed to make sense, he knew what he wanted, and why, and he was going to do it. But as his parents, with our greater experience and understanding, we knew better - we had a wider perspective, and we knew that if we let him wake up at 3.30am, the rest of the day was going to be difficult, to say the least! And we knew, better than he himself did, what was good for him.

But of course we have a parent with far greater knowledge and experience than us. We have a God who created the entire Universe, with a word. A God who doesn't need a Large Hadron Collider to find the Bosun-Higgs particle, because he made it. Who doesn't need a Kepler telescope to find other planets orbiting other suns, because he put them there. A God who designed and made each of us, who our every thought even before we were conceived. A God who knows every detail of our innermost workings - our thoughts, our hopes, our dreams and our needs, better than we do. And a God who wants good things for us, and for the people around.

And yet, how often do I, with my limited human perspective, think I know better than him. How often do I say "not your will Lord, but mine, be done", when really I should be saying "not my will Lord, but yours, be done"...

So, next time I'm lying awake, wondering why my 2 year old thinks he knows better than his 35 year old Dad, maybe I'll stop and wonder why this 35-year-old child thinks he knows better than his Heavenly Dad.

A City Should Be Shining on a Hill

I think something is starting to change. I'm not sure, because if it is, its changing slowly, but I think its starting to become OK to belong to something to again. Let me explain...

For a long time in the UK, belonging to a community, whatever the nature of that community has been seen to be a bit quaint, a bit old fashioned - something that you do if you're not quite able to get along by yourself, in the way that we feel we should be able to.

But I think its starting to change. I think its becoming acceptable, perhaps even in some cases desirable to have something to which you belong. It might be a sports team, a neighbourhood association, a community project. It might even be a church.

People coming along who want to belong to a church is a good thing. But it does bring challenges for those of us already in those churches. Because wanting to belong to a church these days doesn't necessarily mean the same as believing in the things the church believes in. And it almost definately doesn mean behaving in the way that people in the church already expect people to behave.

And here lies the first challenge for those already within the church. Because we need to be able to be open and welcoming to people from outside our cozy little circle, even if their behaviour isn't quite what we'd expect. After all, if we're honest, our behaviour isn't perfect, is it? We may be better at not showing it, and the ways in which we don't match up to God's ways may be less obvious to the outside eye, but they're there alright. So who are we to judge? Really, we should be excited that people have come into our community, and want to be part of it, whilst praying for them and praying that God helps them to see Him for who he really is, because its only through encountering Jesus that people will truly be changed.

But there also lies the second challenge for us in churches, because whilst we need to be open and welcoming, we need to continue to be true to the God we worship - we need to continue to be clear that the very reason our community exists is to worship him, and to spread his word throughout the world. The challenge, if we are to welcome those who come because they want to be part of the community first and foremost is that we don't do so in a way which compromises our beliefs - we don't want to become solely a social club, or a daycare centre, or a social action project - we want to be a living, breathing community, sharing the Grace, Mercy and Love of God with those around us.  

Seperation, Condemnation, Revelation

We just can't help putting people into boxes - I know I do it. I think its a natural human reaction, to assign boxes or labels to people, as a kind of a shorthand to describe who we are, and who other people are in relationship to us.

For example, I am an Evangelical Christian.

Except, when we start putting people into boxes, we soon find the boxes are too big, the labels aren't closely enough defined. We start to label more and more, dividing the boxes up into smaller and smaller partitions,

I am a gently charismatic Evangelical Christian.

But even then, the labels aren't tight enough - so we define more and more.

Now, I am a gently charismatic Evangelical Christian who worships in a Baptist church, who is a church treasurer, and who writes a blog.

Pretty soon, our boxes are so small that we find ourselves pretty much on our own, or isolated with a very small number of like minded people. The problem with this is, because we have focussed on our differences, focussed on why we aren't the same as that group of people over there, we find that actually, we don't want to deal with them, we'd rather stay with the people who are like us. Perhaps if they were to change their mind and come and join us in our box we'd be okay with, but actually, until they admit they're wrong and we're right, then they can stay over there thankyou very much.

Now, I'm not saying that the things that are different are unimportant. In some cases some of the issues are massive, but, honestly, do we really think that we have a monopoly on the truth, in all things at all times... I'm sure I don't, and I'm really sorry if sometimes I come across as if I do. But ultimately, seperation is not good for us - human beings are made to live in communities, to work with other people, to share and learn and live and love together -- even those (like me) who are somewhat intraverted. Neither is it good for us to live a life in which we condemn others for holding different opinions, especially if we don't fully understand what is behind those opinions.

So maybe, instead of boxing people based on the things that are different, I should start looking to build bridges based on the things that are the same. Maybe that way I'll learn something, and of course, in those case where I am right, then its much easier to discuss, explain and convince when I'm alongside, working together with someone with whom I disagree, than it is to stand in my box and yell the truth across into someone else's...

Magnificent!

Sunday morning was the usual Nativity service at Queens Road, and it was magnificent! It had everything you'd expect from a children's nativity -- Mary pulling the tea towel off her head and getting confused about how to put it back on, angels removing their tinsel halos and waving them around, and stealing the shepherds sunglasses (didn't you read the bit where it says all the shepherds were given sunglasses so they could look at the angels without being blinded). Then of course there were the three,  seven wise men (well, Matthew doesn't actually mention the number), some of whom managed to get lost on route to Bethlehem, and one whose crown kept falling over his eyes. 

All of this, plus fun with the advent candles, no doubt causing the health and safety team to have kittens, and of course, the piece de resistance, when one of the little angels decided that baby Jesus (played by a real baby) needed some straw to play with, and dumped a handful onto the somewhat surprised (but otherwise quite happy) baby! Was it a traditional Christmas Card nativity scene? Of course not, but then again, do we really believe the Christmas Card view is anything approaching realistic - of course not! At least here we had a sense of life and vitality - and of children enjoying themselves, and it was that more than anything else which made it truly Magnificent for me.

Not only that, but it got me thinking. I remember, back in the dim and distant past, when I was young enough to take part in the school or church nativity just how important it was to get the right part... I always wanted to be a king, and not just any king, I wanted to be the king who brought the gold - mainly because Frankincense was some kind of girly perfume, and I was never 100% sure exactly what Myrrh was. Others really wanted to be Joseph, or Mary, or a Shepherd.... So yesterday, I started thinking about the characters in the nativity, and their relationship to circumstances we may face today.

Lets start with Mary - a young (probably about 12 years old) mum, certain in the knowledge that God has called her to something big, something very important. Knowing that it wasn't going to be easy, in fact, knowing that it was going to be very very difficult. But knowing that it was what God wanted her to do, so she was going to do it, whatever the consequences.

And Joseph? A good man, who always does what is right, who is told by God to do something which those around him weren't going to like. Joseph was prepared to face scandal, the disapproval of his friends and family and any possible impact on his livelihood for that sake of what he knew to be right, to be good.

How about the shepherds, the outcasts of society - considered undesirable, expendable even. How must they feel, suddenly to be invited to visit the baby. To suddendly be welcomed, accepted, wanted... and yet, how difficult must it be to be there, how embarrassing for them?

Or the Wise Men? Men of power, status, influence, knowledge. But men who recognised that there was something deeper, something more important to be seeking. Men who travelled miles to find something, and were surprised at what they found.

And finally the innkeeper, who wanted to do what he could to help the young couple, but was busy, so very very busy....

These circumstances are all things we may face even today, and the answer today is surely the same as it was then. Come, come to the stable to see the baby - this very special baby who was born to change everything.

This Love Won't Let Me Go

I was reading the book of Judges the other day, and it reminded me of something I really shouldn't have forgotten. Judges can basically be summed up very simply; the people of God, newly settled in their promised land, forget about God and go off and do their own thing, with pretty terrible results. Eventually God sends a "Judge" to sort things out, get the people back on the right track, get rid of whatever foreign power has over-run them this time, and get everything back on track again. Until the people, safe and secure once more, go off on their own again. Repeat ad infinitum.

My first thought as I read this was "how stupid are they". I mean, these people's grandparents were those who God rescued from Egypt, complete Ten Deadly Plagues, the first Passover and of course the miraculous crossing of the Red Sea - and then there was the whole manna from heaven thing, the giving of the Commandments at Sinai and all that shebang. Their parents had been the ones who settled in the Promised Land - who saw the walls of Jericho fall without a fight, and who had been there as the people of Israel were installed in their own lands. How could they forget God, how could they lose their way so easily. 

But then, they were after all just people. Ordinary broken people, living in the same broken world that we inhabit. And given how often I decide I'm going to ignore God, go my own way, do my own thing, because actually, I know better than him, why should I expect any different from them, just because they lived a few thousand years ago? 

But that got me thinking in a different way. Because what I then started to see in the book of Judges was the story of a God who loved his broken useless people so much that he kept coming back for them, even when they ignored him, even when they turned their back on him, even when they chased after some other God. And if he did that for them, then won't he do the same for ordinary, broken, useless me, even though I don't deserve it either? Wow.

One of the common objections to Christianity I hear is the "inconsistent" portrayal of God between the Old and New Testaments, but if you look at passages like Judges in this context, then the loving, merciful God "from the New Testament" can clearly be seen right there in the middle of the Old - and the story is repeated again and again through the time of the Kings, and into the exiles, with God sending priests and prophets over and over again to bring his people back to him, until eventually he sends his only Son - the ultimate answer, the ultimate expression of love that won't let go.   

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I usually try to add something visual to illustrate these blogs, but this time, I failed to find anything particularly relevant. So I thought I'd add a Dilbert cartoon for a bit of light relief - after all, you can never really go wrong with Dilbert:-

I'm ready for what's next

Well, in the White House (the one in Coventry, not Washington DC) we're almost ready for Christmas. Cards are written and posted, presents are bought and wrapped, the tree is up, the house is festively bedecked. The school "nativity" play has been attended (don't get me started on political correctness and the replacement of the traditional Christmas story with Ralph the Reindeer), and today is the final day of school, which means Sarah has almost a whole week at home by herself with two increasingly excited children!

Today, which has apparently been christened "Mad Friday" in honour of the number of work Christmas parties which will be happening today is also the day of my work Christmas do, although thankfully that is going to be a relatively civilised meal this afternoon, with plenty of opportunity to escape before the "madness" truly begins.

This weekend sees the church wrapping Christmas presents on Saturday in Coventry, and of course the "real" Childrens Nativity and the traditional Carol Service on Sunday... Which just leaves packing next week, for the mad dash around the country that is our Christmas this year. The Whites are well and truly ready for Christmas, in no small part (actually, in a very great part) due to Sarah's ceaseless efforts.

But actually, am I really ready for Christmas. With all this busyness, and it has been incredibly busy, have I actually had the time to stop and prepare myself for Christmas? Not in terms of the trappings and fun of the big event, but have I stopped to truly think through the implications of what we're celebrating? Have I really considered the true nature of the baby born in Bethlehem that night? Maybe if I do that, I'll be a bit more ready for what comes next...

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Christmas is Really for the Children
by Steve Turner

Christmas is really for the children.
Especially for children who like animals, stables, stars and babies wrapped in swaddling clothes.
Then there are wise men, kings in fine robes, humble shepherds and a hint of rich perfume.

Easter is not really for the children unless accompanied by a cream filled egg.
It has whips, blood, nails, a spear and allegations of body snatching.
It involves politics, God and the sins of the world.
It is not good for people of a nervous disposition.
They would do better to think on rabbits, chickens and the first snowdrop of spring.


Or they'd do better to wait for a re-run of Christmas
Without asking too many questions about what Jesus did when he grew up or whether there's any connection.

Tonight Thank God its Them Instead of You

The Christmas season is well and truly upon us, and with it, the seemingly endless round of cheesy music and cheesy Christmas number ones - from before the days when the Christmas chart was dominated by the X Factor! Mr Blobby, Bob the Builder, and of course, the cheesiest of all, "Do They Know Its Christmas?"

Don't get me wrong, I think the what the Band Aid single achieved, in each of the three times it has been released was phenomenal, not just because of the money it raised, but because of the way it raised the profile of the issues in Ethiopia at the time, and also because of the way it launched the whole concept of the charity record. But everytime (probably at least once every couple of days at the moment) that I hear it, the lyrics make me cringe. I mean, honestly what were Bob Geldof and Midge Ure thinking when they wrote some of those lines, not least Bono's line quoted in the title of this blog. 

But lets just stop for a minute and try and work out what Bob and Midge were really trying to say. Lets assume that they weren't presuming on the inevitably of famine somewhere in the world. Lets assume that, despite how it reads, they weren't really offering their thanks to the Almighty for someone else's suffering, as it allows them not to suffer. Let us take it instead as something equivalent to a "There but for the Grace of God, go I" line, and remember how much we in the developed world have to truly be thankful for at Christmas time. 

And of course, its not just a first vs. third world issue. There are plenty of people here in Coventry, here in the UK who are in need this Christmas. I've already blogged about fairtrade issues, so here I'd like to raise the profile of a couple of more local things that Queens Road church are involved in - things that help people in the local area who otherwise may not really know its Christmas at all...

Coventry Foodbank is run by a coalition of local churches, who collect and store food in a number of distribution points across the city. Various professionals - doctors, social workers, CAB, local charities then identify those in need of short term help in the form of a three day food parcel, and issue a voucher, which they take to the distribution to receive their food parcel. Clients are entitled to up to three vouchers, which should give them the food they need to help them through a crisis - for example when benefits payments change or are delayed. 

Coventry Foodbank was seeded by the Trussell Trust, a UK wide organisation who seek to work with local communities and churches to meet this growing need - please see their website for more details or to find your local foodbank.

Open Christmas runs in Queens Roads premises, and although it isn't something started or organised by us, a number of members of the congregation are involved on a voluntary basis. Providing a night shelter and food, drink and refreshments for the homeless, this group seeks to “To provide Food, Shelter, Warmth and Friendship to the Homeless” and have done so now for 19 years. 

She Travels Outside of Karma

I knew this would happen. Yesterday, I started talking about Grace, but its such a big, important subject, that now, I can't stop thinking about things to say about it, so I'm back on the topic today.

You see, the problem with Grace, is that we don't deserve it. Yes, I know, thats kind of the whole point, but I think our society is so caught up on the idea of Karma, that we get what we deserve, that "what goes around, comes around", we're just not conditioned to accept the idea of something being completely free, of an unearned, undeserved gift. So I guess its not really a problem with Grace, but a problem with us, and our society. 

We see it clearly every year at Queens Road, because once a year (this year its Saturday the 17th December) we go into the City Centre and sit around in the cold, wrapping presents for people, for free. (I say we, but as my present wrapping skills are next to nil, my contribution is to look after the children for a couple of hours so my wife can go).

Every year we get the same responses from people. We get the people looking for the catch, expecting that if they take us up on the offer, we're going to ensnare them and somehow make them come to church. We get those who ask how much it costs, and when we tell them its free, they look around for a donation box to pay anyway.

And of course we get those poor confused souls who just want to know why we're doing it, which is great, because it gives us a chance to explain that we're doing it as a small way to show love and blessing to the people of Coventy, to help them a little bit. Because when you've received something as life transforming as God's grace, you can't help but want to be generous back - to give to others something, even its just a tiny bit of what you've received...

 

Its also a thought that changed the World...

The Economist magazine recently published an article, challenging the role of the Church (in this case the Church of England) in our new "Austerity" Britain -- which raises some very interesting questions, and of course, as if the want of journalists, makes no real attempt to answer them...

http://www.economist.com/node/21541399

Most telling is the closing paragraph, which suggests the church needs to provide something more "more spiky and distinctive than social democracy in a clerical collar". I'm not sure about the church needing to be more "spiky", but the need to be distinctive is something with which I whole-heartedly agree. 

Now, before I go any further, let me re-iterate that I do believe social action is a vital part of my faith, and that care for the poor, the disadvantaged, the down-trodden is absolutely central to Christianity. I've already blogged once on the subject and no doubt its a subject that I will return to in the future. It saddens me that in the past, so many evangelical Christians have forgotten this truth and dismissed any kind of social justice as wishy-washy liberal theology.

But I believe the church, the gathered believers in Jesus Christ, has a duty, a God-given duty in fact, to go further than simply offering social justice. Because we have found his grace, his undeserved, unconditional loving grace, which changes and transforms lives, and ultimately changes the world. 


Grace, which brings justice, freedom, equality, inclusion to all those who choose it. Sure, it may not be the same kind of justice, freedom, equality or inclusion that people think they are looking for - it certainly wasn't what the First Century Jews expected, and its probably not what the Occupy London protesters think they are looking for. But God's lavish and abundant Grace is what we all need.


There's so much I could say about Grace, and I probably will in the future.. but for now, to return to the Economist's conclusion, or lack of one, then surely, if the Church (be it of England, or anywhere else) is truly serious about becoming more relevant, and being a source of "national strength", shouldn't it be through living, breathing and acting out a lifestyle of Grace?

When Love Comes To Town....

So many people the year have commented to me "its Christmas now, I've just seen the Coca-Cola advert for the first time". And this weekend we've been to see Father Christmas on the steam trains, we've put up the Christmas tree and decorations (and put them up again as the lights in the conservatory decided they were'nt going to stay up the first time). Christmas cards are written (thanks Sarah) and presents are purchased (thanks Amazon) - the trappings are in place. But is this really Christmas?

The traditional nativity scene - a tidy stable, Mary, not a hair out of place looks lovingly at her newborn son, who sleeps quietly and peacefully in a straw filled manger - no crying from the infant son of God! Watching over them, a serene-looking Joseph stands by, as do the cattle and donkeys, seemingly undisturbed by these strangers in their home, even the little one in their food box. Around the manager stand the shepherds, bringing their cute fluffy sheep, and outside, the innkeeper is greeting three well dressed noblemen, bringng their expensive gifts ... is this really Christmas?

Or is it the story of an unmarried teenage mother, 100 miles from home, giving birth in a dark, dirty cave, surrounded by smelly animals, knowing that this is just the start of an amazing journey, trusting in her God regardless of the consequences. Is it the tale of respectable man who chooses a path which can only lead to scandal and gossip and which leads ultimately to exile, doing so because he knows that whilst others may not see that he is doing right, what he does is good?

Is it the story of a band of homeless shepherds, scratching a living looking after other people's sheep - out on the hillside's fighting wolves and lions because frankly the rest of the world considers them expendable, chosen by God to be the first outsiders to hear of the birth of his son. A story of the acceptance of the unacceptable - of inclusion and blessing to all?

Christmas - the eruption of the infinite into the finite world. Christmas - an explosion of love transforming not just the moment, but all eternity. Christmas - God's answer.

. 

Hush now, cease to speak, so I may speak...

Well, thats the most important job of December, possibly of the year, complete. My six year old has posted his letter to Father Christmas (or Santa, as he insists on calling him -- grrr... I feel a blog about creeping Americanisms coming in the future....). 

"Dear Santa Claus

Thankyou for the presents you gave me last year. This year I have been really good and would like these things please:

..." 

For some reason, this got me thinking about my prayer. How often does my prayer life deteriorate into a Christmas list of things I'd like. Oh yes, my prayers are informed by those good Sunday school lessons of tsp (Thankyou, Sorry, Please), and the more advanced version ACTS (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication) - but so often, the Please bit seems to take over and my prayer becomes little more than a shopping list, a list of wants and desires, perhaps even needs, but focused on me and on other people, whereas surely it should be truly focused on God. 

Why is this? I always start out with the best of intentions... I wonder if perhaps its because I'm actually not that good at listening when I pray. Prayer is supposed to be a two way conversation, and if the old adage that "we have two ears and only one mouth, so we should listen twice as much as we speak" is true about our human conversations, why should that be any different for our conversations with God. 

So that's my challenge for  today, this month, this year now - to learn to shut up a little, and listen to what God has to say to me. And perhaps, just perhaps, if I do that, when I do "open my mouth" what comes out will be a little more focused on Him, and a little less of a letter to Father Christmas!

You've Got Someone to Blame

A recent telephone conversation:-

Mobile Phone Rings -- Unknown Number
Me: Hello
Caller: Is that Mr White?
Me: Yes, who is this please?
Caller: I'm calling from (name-of-claims-company-spoken-very-fast-so-I-can't-actually-catch-it). According to our database, you may have had an accident in the last 5 years that wasn't your fault.
Me: No, not that I can recall.
Caller: Really? No accident at work, (Me:No) no car accident (Me:No), no accident in a shop or public place (Me:No).
Me: Can I ask what your database actually says, because the information is obviously wrong
Caller: No its not, it says you may have had an accident in the last five years - anyone may have had an accident.
Me: So, you mean its just a database of names of people to call and hassle. In that case please can you..
Caller rings off, presumably to avoid a request to remove my name from the database.

The thing is, these calls are hardly uncommon these days. It seems we live in a culture where what we really want to do, whenever anything goes wrong, is find someone to blame. Anyone to blame, that is, anyone so long as its not ourselves

You see it everywhere - certainly all over the news. Things go wrong, blame the government. Or the previous government, the Unions, the Press, George W. Bush (well, we can blame a lot of things on Dubya), Gordon Brown, Maggie Thatcher.... Not big enough - okay, lets blame the Eurozone, America, climate change. Still not big enough... I know, we can blame the bankers. Okay, so its really big - lets blame God then.

Its not new -- lets go right back to the beginning - when Adam and Eve eat the apple and God confronts them, Adam says "It was the woman's fault", and Eve responds "no, blame the serpent!"

But actually, shouldn't we start looking a bit closer to home... in the early 20th Century - the Time newspaper posed the question "What's wrong with the world?". They had a number of answers, covering a range of economic, political and sociological answers. In contrast, G.K. Chesterton's response was:-

Dear Sirs:

I am.

Sincerely Yours,

G. K. Chesterton

Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own

With this title, regular readers (can I consider people regular readers when this is only my fourth post?) may be expecting a discussion of Philippians 4:10 - 13 - and there's a lot I could say about this passage and how it applies to me at the moment. But actually, today I feel its more important to talk about help of a more human nature.

Things have been so busy recently. I've had a church budget to prepare and present, I've had meetings, oh, so many meetings to go to, and I've been really busy at work. And, as I said in my post on Tuesday, I was baptised on Sunday morning.

Now, despite having been to a number of baptisms at Queens Road in my 10 years there, I'm not surely I really realised how many people it took to arrange such an event. Obviously it needs some baptismal candidates, and a minister, but then there's the army of people who get the church ready - the people who fill the baptistry, who chase around to find the heater and start heating the water at least 2 days before the event so the water isn't too cold (I'm told its usually longer but I think someone wanted to prove to the Treasurer they weren't spending too much on heating bills!) and who make sure there are towels available, plastic bowls in toilets for people to put wet clothes in and plastic sheeting down protecting the carpets. And then there's the person with the video camera, connected up to the projection desk, making sure that everyone in the church can see the big event, the people who pray for the candidates after their baptism... and of course the person who, as soon as the dripping wet minister and newly-baptised have made their way out to get changed is there with the mop, cleaning up, making sure its safe for the rest of the congregation afterwards.

No doubt there were even more people involved than that - if I've missed someone from the list I'm sorry. And of course these people are all on top of the usual army of musicians, readers, stewards, welcomers, projectionists, childrens group leaders, sound desk operators and so on who are needed to make a Sunday service at Queens Road work.

I can't thank all these people enough for the part they made in making sure Sunday went smoothly - the fact that it all just came together was such a blessing to those of us going into the water. And the same is true for the budget, and for all the other meetings - I couldn't do all I do without the army of helpers who just get on and do their bit, often unseen and unthanked, every week.

However, there is one person who needs to be singled out. Without my wife Sarah, I couldn't do half of what I do. In fact, I don't know if I could do any of what I do. Without her dealing with the practicalities of day to day life - those minor irrelevancies(!) like shopping, cooking, doing the washing and the cleaning, then what would I do? Without her to look after the boys, to make sure the oldest gets to school on time, with his lunch, his homework, the numerous letters and reply slips and everything else he needs, and to make sure that our little one is getting to do all the fun things that he loves - Toddler groups, music groups, gymnastics, swimming, as well as dealing with his food allergies, I would be stuck.

But even more importantly, what would I do without her to talk to (rant at?), to bounce ideas off, to discuss problems and issues with, to advise and help me in difficult situations, to be my best friend and to love me unconditionally and with all my failings and shortcomings. I am so grateful for everything she does for me, and so grateful to God for giving us each other.

I got to stand up and take a step

I posted a Facebook Status recently about the call from a number of quarters to reduce or eliminate foreign aid, to give the government more money to spend here in the UK, and therefore reduce the "cuts" which are causing so much pain. I was pretty vocal about why I think this is the wrong thing to do.

In my opinion, the amount of aid we give is pretty paltry, compared to the amount we (the western world) have, and continue to, exploit the human and natural resources of the third world. Whilst the amount of Fairtrade products available (and presumably therefore purchased) has increased rapidly in the last few years, this is still just a drop in the ocean compared to the amount of non-Fairtrade goods which we buy from the third world, and whilst the efforts of the Jubilee 2000 campaign, the Make Poverty History campaign, and the ongoing campaigns of organisations such as One have resulted in massive reductions in third world debt, there are still vast amounts of interest payments being levyed by the so called first world against the third world...

But of course, its not just about governments. In fact, leaving it just to the government is a denial of our responsibility in this stuff. Actually, its our lifestyle choices which impact the quality of life of many hundreds or thousands of people in the third world. If I choose to buy chocolate made by a company who imports cocoa beans grown on plantations which use traffiked child labour, then I am responsible for that Traffiking. I need to stand up and say "No, I don't want to be part of that".

Will it change things overnight? Of course not. But if everyone who is concerned by this sort of stuff takes a step then actually, it could change the world.

And even if it doesn't change things, its still the right thing to do. I was reading Isaiah 58 the other day -- which Jesus quotes in Matthew 25 - its clear that care for the poor, the disadvantaged, the oppressed is God's heart... and true faith, true worship of him always includes an element of care for all those around us. So, I'll do my bit, take my stand, and trust in him to take care of the bigger picture.

Moment of Surrender

You may have picked up that I, along with my brother and sister-in-law, were baptised on Sunday morning. It was a really powerful service, made more so by the fact that another member of the congregation, who has had a long journey to get this point also came forward for baptism at the same time. It was a joy and a privilege to share such a special day with her, and amazing to see God's awesome power at work in peoples' lives that morning.

For those who weren't there, or those who were and are interested, below is my testimony (or at least what I planned to say, I'm sure it didn't come out quite like this at the time). Its a bit longer than a usual blog post, but then, as I said at the time, I've always been the long-winded one!

“My faith has always been a gradual journey. I don’t have a story with massive U turns, huge rebellion or a dramatic conversion experience - I have a story of a consistent and faithful God who continues to lead me in a journey of discovery with him, a journey which, although the destination and end goal is certain, continues to take me by surprise as each day is completely different.

For as long as I can remember, faith has been an important part of my life. I was brought up in a Christian home, by loving Christian parents who demonstrated by their example the importance of Christian Faith. Aged 5 or 6 I would have told you I loved God, by age 8 or so I’d have been able to explain that Jesus died and came back to life so that we could go to heaven, and by the age of 11 I had given my life to him and asked the Holy Spirit to come into my life to help me live the way he wanted me to. And, though it doesn’t make for the most exciting Testimony, I’m pleased to be able to say that I have never strayed from a desire to live up to that commitment, even when I haven’t always done very well at it!

As I was in a Methodist Church at the time, the natural step from there was confirmation, which was an important step for me - a public declaration of what I believed, and a public statement that this was something that I was going to stick with, as well as a recognition that it was the right thing to do in the community I was part of at the time.

So, as we all do, I grew up,  and went off to University. Whilst I was there, apart from meeting my future sister-in-law and then my future wife and managing to get a degree I used the opportunity to rebel, as all good students do. In my case I rebelled against the traditional worship of the Methodist church at home, trying out various flavours of charismatic new churches across Birmingham. I learned a lot from this experience, seeing a refreshing  and exciting openness to the power of the Spirit, but also, gaining a new respect for some of the traditional elements of worship which were missing in those churches. Whilst I was happy there at the time, and look back at that as an important part of my journey, I recognised that I could never have settled permanently into that sort of church, partly because of their emphasis on the “experience” but mainly because under pinning everything that went on in those churches was a sense that they, and they alone had found the “right” way to be church - they considered themselves to be the finished product. Anyone with a different understanding of faith, with different traditions and backgrounds needed to conform to their way in order to be fully part of the community, and to be fully blessed by God. In contrast I believe that because God has made each of us different, with different skills, abilities and ways of understanding the world, we each need to worship him in a different way - which means as a church we should be a  community which appreciates all and is willing to work with that diversity.

Through all of this God led me first to Ross on Wye Baptist church, and from there, with a new job at Jaguar, to Coventry and to Queens Road, and here, for the first time since I left home go to Uni, I found a church which I could call my “home church” - a place where, despite my not always agreeing with everything which happened, I felt part of the community and was happy to settle and eventually raise my family here.

 

Soon after we were married, Sarah and I became members here, following Sarah’s baptism. At the time, I remember having a very brief conversation with Grenville, who asked if I had been baptised and when I said no, he asked if I wanted to be. I explained that over the last few years I had been to a number of Baptisms of people who had already been confirmed and listened to them, in their testimonies talk about how wrong their confirmation was, how they’d been confirmed because it was the done thing in their church, not because they’d had any particular conviction to do, or how they’d been confirmed, drifted away from faith and now been brought back - in all these cases, they saw baptism as a statement that they were now getting back on the right track. Because I wasn’t in that place, I assessed the question logically and rationally and decided that I didn’t need to get baptised, and I was happy with that answer until very recently.

 

So that's why I’m stood here today, not as a way of replacing or invalidating the things that have gone  before in my life, but in grateful and heartfelt recognition of those things that God has done for me, and in acceptance and welcoming of the things he still wants to do. I stand here not as a finished product, but recognising that I still have a lot to learn, and that, although I still haven’t found all the answers I’m looking for, those answers will all be found in God, who will reveal them in his own time."

I Still Haven't Found....

"I believe in the kingdom come,

Then all the colors will bleed into one
But yes I'm still running

You broke the bonds and you
Loosed the chains
Carried the cross
Of my shame
You know I believe it

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for..."

I've been a U2 fan for a long time, and, whilst I love the music, its Bono's lyrics which really speak to me and get me thinking. And just recently, the last verse of "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For..." (above) has been giving me a lot to think about...

The thing is, I'm proud to be a Christian. And I'm certain of what I believe in (the Evangelical Alliance Basis of Faith is probably as good a summary as any for the time being). But within these confines, I have questions.... oh, so many questions! If I think about it my life and my faith as a journey, then whilst the ultimate destination is certain, I've got no idea of the twists and turns that are going to take me there!

And, though that may not always be the most comfortable place to be in, I'm glad that I still have questions - because actually, I don't ever want to become complacent. When I become complacent, when I stop asking questions, thats when I stop looking to God for the answers, and thats when my faith becomes nothing more than cold religiosity.


Because God is bigger than I can understand. His ways are so different and foreign to me, that actually, if I ever think I completely, fully understand him, if I ever think I don't need to keep searching, to keep asking questions, to keep looking at things afresh, then frankly, I've lost the plot...

So, this blog is a place where I can ask questions - where I can explore the twists and turns of my journey with God, trusting that what he plans is for the best, even if it seems difficult, even if I don't understand it. I may talk about faith, I may talk about family life, I may talk about current affairs.... I'm not sure yet. How long it'll last, how often I will post, whether anyone will read it are all also unanswered questions at the moment.... but maybe ones that will become apparent soon!